What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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