What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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