What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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