What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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