What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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