What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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