What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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