What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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