What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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