What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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