What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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