What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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