What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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