What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.

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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.

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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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