What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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