What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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