What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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