What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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