What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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