What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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