What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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