What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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