What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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