What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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