What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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