What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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A seal walks into a club...



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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.

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