What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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