What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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