What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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