What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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