What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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