What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.

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