I think I'm coming down with something!
or
The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
or
Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
or
Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
or
feel really weird about donuts right now.
or
As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
or