What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"



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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".

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