What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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