What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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