What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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