What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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