What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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