What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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