What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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