What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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