What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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