What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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