What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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