What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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