What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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