What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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