What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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