What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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