What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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