What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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