What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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