What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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