What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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