What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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