What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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