What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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