What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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