What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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