What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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