What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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