What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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