What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.

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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.

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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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