What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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