What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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