What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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