What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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