What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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