What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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