What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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