What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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