What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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