What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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