What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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