What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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