What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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