What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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