What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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