What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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