What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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