What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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