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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?
Her New Jersey.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.
I can hardly contain myself.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,
if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
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When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a garage.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?
Because he is so cool!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?
He was tired of working for peanuts.
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