What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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