What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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