What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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