What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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