What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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