What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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