What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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