What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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