What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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