What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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