What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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