What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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