What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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