What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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