What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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