What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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