What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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