What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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