What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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