What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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