What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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