What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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