What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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