What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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