What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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