What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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