What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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