What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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