What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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