What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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