What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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