What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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