What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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