What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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