What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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