What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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