What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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