What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!

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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!

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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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