What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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