What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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