What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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