What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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