What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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