What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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