What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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