What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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