What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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