What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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