What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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