What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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