What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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