What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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