What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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