What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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