What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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