What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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