What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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