What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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