What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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