What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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