What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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