What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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