What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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