What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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