What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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