What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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