What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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