What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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