What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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