What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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