What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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