What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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