What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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