What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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