What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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