What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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