What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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