What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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