What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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