What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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