What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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