What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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