What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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