What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.

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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.

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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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