What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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