What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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