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What did the flag say to the pole?
Nothing, it just waved.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?
A robber ducky.
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What is green and pecks on trees?
Woody the Wood Pickle.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?
On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?
A Doberman.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?
ICE ICE Baby......
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What did one cow say to the other?
Mooooooove over
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