What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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