What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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