What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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