What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.

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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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