What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!

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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.


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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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