What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.

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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.

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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.

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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.

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