What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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