What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.

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