What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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