What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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