What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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