What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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