What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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