What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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