What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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