What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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