What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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