What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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