What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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