What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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