What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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