What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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