What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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