What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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