What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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