What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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