What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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