What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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