What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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