What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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