What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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