What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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