What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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