What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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