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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?
It's time to go to sweep.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?
Stop! You're under a vest.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?
A swordfish
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What's black and white and red all over?
A newspaper!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?
Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.
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What's round and bad-tempered?
A vicious circle.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?
A waist of time!
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Why did the strawberry call 911?
It was in a jam!
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