What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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