What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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