What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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