What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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