What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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