What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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