What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.

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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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