What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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