What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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