What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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