What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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