What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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