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What did the number 0 say to number 8?
Nice belt!
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Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?
To visit the milky way.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.
I've lost three days already.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?
A crossing guard.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A Flat Major
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.
Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?
It broke the law of gravity!
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Which day do fish hate?
Fryday
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