What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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