What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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