What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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