What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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