What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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