What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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