What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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