What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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