What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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