What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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